Loaded: A Message from the Editor top
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a fantastic time of year it is to be a Pezhead. The leaves
are changing, the temperature is finally dropping, and the
new Glow-in-the-Dark Halloween dispensers are everywhere
to be found.
few dispensers that I got in September are due to the watchful
eyes of some friends who know how obsessed I am with Pez.
These finds included a Japanese Jango Fett and Clone Trooper,
and some older dispensers from a local yard sale. I'm not
sure how many traffic laws I broke getting to said yard
sale, but the new Pez on my shelf tell me it was all worth
that you will find this month's Pezhead Monthly worth
it as well. Leading off the issue are some scary Pez Horror
Movies. Also featured is an interview with the Glowing Witch
Pez dispenser that takes an unfortunate turn. We also have
the first-ever Pez Almost-Conversation of the Month, along
with some spooky Pez Poetry and, yes, the return of Petey
next month, take care and keep flipping that Pez!
Editor, Pezhead Monthly
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needn't turn into a vampire bat or don a hockey mask to
strike fear in the hearts of Pez-loving filmgoers everywhere.
Just in time for Halloween, the following three movies will
make you lock your
doors, hide under a blanket, and find comfort in the nearest
afraid. Be very afraid.
Night We Ran Out of Pez
one harrowing evening when, after having a Pez party
and sharing delicious Pez candy, a group of teenagers
suddenly find that their supply of Pez has vanished.
When the clock strikes midnight, the local stores
are closed, and all the dispensers are empty, these
teenagers will discover what it truly means to be
by One, They All Fall Down
starts as an innocent gust of wind turns into a Pez frightfest
of epic proportions. When Goofy Pez starts to wobble and
tips over, Daisy Pez and Pluto Pez are not far behind. Will
any of the dispensers in the Pez collection be spared from
suffering the "domino effect"? Will help come
in time to save the vintage Betsy Ross and Astronaut Pez
dispensers from being knocked over? Will you ever open a
window near your Pez collection again?
the truly brave of heart, be sure to check out "One
by One, They All Fall Down: In 3D."
Store That Never Had New Pez
by the true stories of Pezheads across the country,
this is the blood-curdling tale of a small town grocery
store whose shelves have been lined with all-too common
Pez dispensers like Fred Flintstone, Garfield, and
for years upon years! Witness the
unusual space-time continuum that prevents this store
from getting the most recent dispensers, and hope
against hope that your local store doesn't get sucked
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a dream the other night,
One that filled me with such fright,
The air was thin, I almost gagged-
Trapped inside of a Pez bag!
This plastic prison wasn't dandy,
For though there were two packs of candy,
I had no arms with which to grab,
No fingers to remove the wrap.
I was just a head and stem, and
Surrounded by the scent of lemon;
Instead of skin and bones and things,
I was of plastic, paint, and springs.
The smile that was drawn on me
Belied my deep anxiety-
I tried to scream, but soon did find
I only heard this in my mind!
bodies passed me by,
And on occasion two big eyes
Would peer into my plastic cell,
With gazes I knew all too well.
They'd wonder if it would be smart
To add me to their shopping cart,
Or if they'd rather come on back
When I am on the discount rack.
Inside my mind, I begged and pleaded
To be purchased, to be needed,
But on my face, that stupid grin
Told nothing of the pain within.
And then that moment did arrive,
A hand extended, so alive,
But not towards me, I realized,
And then my fear did multiply.
worst, I thought, had come to pass,
But I was very wrong, alas,
For at that point, my eyes did see
A Pez, identical to me!
The face, the stem, the plastic bag,
The same amount on the price tag;
In ev'ry sense, it was my clone,
And yet I felt so cold, alone.
For though in him I was reflected,
Instead of me, he was selected.
What injustice, o what offense!
This out-of-Pez experience!
This gave me pause to contemplate:
I would not know the crueler fate,
To be entombed day after day,
Or see myself going away.
up from this chilling dream,
Hoping things weren't as they seemed.
But just in case it was that drastic,
I freed my Pez from all that plastic.
And though I couldn't see or hear
Any trace of shock or fear,
This rescuing was not in vain,
For I had felt their lonely pain.
But when I lined them on the shelf,
Another chill coursed through myself;
I quickly grabbed the duplicates
And sold them on the Internet.
Away they'd go, to someplace warm,
Not knowing of their second forms,
And never having cause to bear
The horror of my Pez nightmare.
or Treat, smell my
Feet, give me something good to
Eat. Pez will suffice.