Spring Loaded: A Message from the Editor top of page | cover page

Welcome to Pezhead Monthly!

Fresh off the heels of the 2011 Pez Poetry Slam last month, this month's issue is one of the biggest ones we've had in a while. We start off with an alternate look at the iconic band known as The Monkees as Pez dispensers, including Pez-flavored reimagining of five of their most well-known songs. Then, after a brief hiatus, the Five Questions feature returns with Captain America as its subject. There's also a recap of my time in St. Louis last month, where I caught the last few hours of a Pez convention, and came across some more Pez in a legendary restaurant in that fine city. Rounding out this issue is some Pez Poetry and the Pez Almost-Quote of the Month.

We're less than two weeks away from Pezamania 21, and I am very excited to be going, of course. For those readers who will also be there, I look forward to seeing you! I will be handing out free copies of the paper edition of this year's Pez Poetry Slam, as well as free back issues of all previous Pez Poetry Slams. I'll also have a few of my extra Pez to sell or trade at the swap party and from my room.

You can read all about my adventures at Pezamania 21 in next month's issue. Take care and see you then!

Joe Durrant
Editor, Pezhead Monthly
joe@pezheadmonthly.com

If The Monkees Were Pez Dispensers top of page | cover page

The Monkees started out four young men on a musical TV show in the 1960s, and quickly grew into a cultural phenomenon known for several instantly recognizable songs. And they are still going strong with many devoted fans, as evidenced by their current 45th Anniversary Tour. I had the privilege to attend this tour last month, along with my girlfriend, who very well might be the biggest Monkees fan on the planet. As I was sitting there in the audience, enjoying the music of these very talented performers, I began to wonder: what

It's fair to say that even if they were Pez dispensers, they'd be too busy singing to put anybody down.

Hey Hey, We're The Pezheads
To the tune of “(Theme From) The Monkees (TV version)”
Copyright 2011 JoePez Publications

Here we come
Walking in your store
We got a lot of Pez, man,
And now we want some more

Hey hey, we're the Pezheads!
Dispensers are what we collect!
We tilt back heads like crazy
And pull candy out of necks.

We hit all the garage sales,
We check out all of the stores,
When Pez is up for auction,
We get into bidding wars.

Hey hey, we're the Pezheads!
And we got something to say:
We'll always live the sweet life
'Cause Pez is here to stay.

Vintage Dispenser
To the tune of “Daydream Believer”
Copyright 2011 JoePez Publications

Oh, I can see you are down,
Can't escape your painted frown
And everything is giant and so strange
And you're alone, by yourself,
No one else is on that shelf,
But I suspect that one day things will change

Cheer up, plastic treat
Life is rather sweet
You're a vintage dispenser,
Mint condition with no feet

You once had it hard,
Being stuck there on a card,
Wondering if that's your destiny.
But now you're free, breathing air,
Belonging to someone who cares,
So how bad, baby, can it really be?

Cheer up, plastic treat
Life is rather sweet
You're a vintage dispenser,
Mint condition with no feet

Cheer up, plastic treat
Life is rather sweet
You're a vintage dispenser,
Mint condition with no feet

Cheer up, plastic treat
Life is rather sweet
You're a vintage dispenser,
Mint condition with no feet

Strawberry Flavor
To the tune of “I'm a Believer”
Copyright 2011 JoePez Publications

I thought candy was a children's novelty
Meant for little kids but not for me.
Hershey bars and Skittles,
Nerds and Bottle Caps,
If it's all the same, I think I'll pass...

But then I tilt your head,
It's strawberry flavor!
A brick of Pez, it's making me smile
I'm fond of... strawberry flavor,
I'm gonna crave it for a while.

I thought candy wasn't that spectacular
Tasted some and then you tasted all
From the plastic wrapper,
To your lips and tongue,
Get a sugar buzz and then you're done...

But then I tilt your head,
It's strawberry flavor!
A brick of Pez, it's making me smile
I'm fond of... strawberry flavor,
I'm gonna crave it for a while.

Hershey bars and Skittles,
Nerds and Bottle Caps,
If it's all the same, I think I'll pass...

But then I tilt your head,
It's strawberry flavor!
A brick of Pez, it's making me smile
I'm fond of... strawberry flavor,
I'm gonna crave it for a while.

Pez Convention's Coming
To the tune of “Pleasant Valley Sunday”
Copyright 2011 JoePez Publications

It is July, you have to sigh,
It seems there just is no relievin'.
But then you see in just two weeks,
There's something happenin' in Cleveland.

Another Pez convention's coming
So pack your bags, let's hit the road
We're gonna find some vintage Pez for sure,
It will be so good to reload.

You can't resist, you make a list
Of things to add to your collection.
You clear the way in your display
For future objects of affection.

Another Pez convention's coming
You're gonna be where you belong
Rooms to hop and so much Pez to buy
Till your spending cash is done

There will be others, mate, to whom you can relate
About the magic of your hobby
You might not know at first, just look for those Pez shirts
As you're walking through the lobby

Da da da da, da da da da, da da da da da da da daaaa
Da da da da, da da da da, da da da da da da da daaaa

Another Pez convention's coming
So pack your bags, let's hit the road
Another Pez convention's coming
You're gonna be where you belong

Another Pez convention's coming
(A Pez convention's coming)
Another Pez convention's coming
(A Pez convention's coming)

Some Pez For Me, Some Pez For You
To the tune of “A Little Bit Me, A Little Bit You”
Copyright 2011 JoePez Publications

Hold on, girl won't you hold on,
Please don't you take offense.
I passed out a lot of Pez, yes,
But there's more to dispense.

Girl, please don't despair
There's enough Pez here for us to share
I said girl, you know that it's true,
There's some Pez for me, and some Pez for you.

It might seem that I'm empty
But girl, there's more to come
There's Pez comin' at ya
When I press my thumb

Girl, please don't despair
There's enough Pez here for us to share
I said girl, you know that it's true,
There's some Pez for me, and some Pez for you.

Oh girl, please don't despair
There's enough Pez here for us to share
I said girl, you know that it's true,
There's some Pez for me, and some Pez for you.

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