Although
he is not an official product of Pez Inc., SpongeBob Pez
is as real as they come. |
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Pezhead
Monthly: SpongeBob Pez, you are the first
ever "fantasy dispenser" interviewed by this
publication. I don't think I have to tell you that there
is not exactly universal appeal for Fantasy Pez dispensers,
and that this is the reason why Pezhead Monthly is conducting
this interview at an undisclosed location. Why do you
think that Fantasy dispensers have not yet garnered widespread
admiration?
SpongeBob
Pez: Well, I can certainly see where the
so-called "Pez Purists" are coming from. After
all, I am not an "official" Pez dispenser. Fantasy
dispensers such as myself are not created in by machines
in a factory, but in bedrooms and basements and garages
of independent hobbyists. We are not sold at grocery stores,
but rather on eBay and at Pez conventions. So we're not
viewed as "authentic" and are not given the
respect that traditional dispensers enjoy.
PM:
In fairness, SpongeBob Pez, a lot of the
criticism that Fantasy Pez dispensers receive seems justified.
To create Fantasy Pez, sometimes people just rip the head
off a normal dispenser- that is terrifying in its own
right- and then add another head. Then they sell it on
eBay for tens if not hundreds of dollars. Doesn't this
disregard for the quality of a Pez dispenser denigrate
the hobby?
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SP:
I'll give you that, sir. There have long been
stories of people taking a Happy Meal toy and sticking it on
top of a Pez dispenser stem. That kind of shoddy craftsmanship
benefits no one. But there are also some very well made fantasy
dispensers. I hate to brag here, but I consider myself to be
a very well designed Pez.
PM:
I agree wholeheartedly, SpongeBob Pez, you are
truly one of the exceptions that prove the rule. Whoever designed
you did so with utmost care and precision. However, and please
forgive me for continuing with this confrontational line of
questioning, do you harbor any envy towards "official"
Pez dispensers found in stores?
SP:
Confrontational, you say? Heck, these questions
are softballs. You should have seen some of the questions Ted
Koppel was throwing at me. That man sure doesn't pull any punches.
He almost made me cry at one point… I'm sorry, what was
your question again?
PM:
Nevermind, let's move on to a more pleasant topic:
the New Year. What kinds of New Year's resolutions have you
made for 2003?
SP:
Well, I would like to tour the country with some
of my friends, such as Patrick, Sandy, and of course Squidward.
If they ever get made into Pez dispensers, that is.
PM:
SpongeBob Pez, you have been a gracious guest
who has hopefully cleared up some of the misconceptions of fantasy
Pez dispensers. Any parting thoughts for our readers?
SP:
Just one thought comes to mind: living in a pineapple
under the sea doesn't hold a candle to being part of a Pez collection.
