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Almost Five Questions for R2 Pez

With the release of "Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones," as well as three Star Wars Pez dispensers in May 2002, Pezhead Monthly is extremely honored to present this exclusive interview with the R2D2 Pez dispenser, with special guest translator C3P0 Pez Dispenser.

R2 Pez
The R2D2 Pez dispenser bleeps like a true champion.
Pezhead Monthly: R2D2 Pez, you are one of the three new Star Wars Pez dispensers released this year, along with Jango Fett Pez and Clone Trooper Pez. What are your thoughts on joining the already nine other Star Wars Pez dispensers out there?

R2D2 Pez: Beep blip blip beep whirr beep beep.

C3P0 Pez: He says that he is honored to join the illustrious Star Wars Pez family, even if it means sharing shelf space with Ewok Pez and Chewbacca Pez. Between the two of them, there's hardly enough flea control medication to go around.

PM: I guess I can understand that. R2D2 Pez, you are one of those rare dispensers whose full body is on the head of the dispenser. Does being part of this elite group of dispensers put undue pressure on you, or are you handling it relatively well?

R2D2 Pez: Bleep blip beep beep whirrrrrr blip bleep bleep.

C3P0 Pez: R2 says he knows that not every Pez character gets to appear fully on their own Pez dispenser, and he considers himself quite fortunate in that respect. However, he takes solace in the fact that he is not as slimy-looking as Worm Pez, and he does not need to hide in a shell like Easter Chick Pez.

PM: I suppose you raise a valid point there. R2 Pez, you and C3P0 Pez have been through a lot together. Does your friendship extend beyond the realm of the famous movies you star in, or are you pretty much only on-screen friends?

R2D2 Pez: Whirrr blip bleep bleep blip blip blip bleeeeep.

C3P0 Pez: R2 says that he has the greatest respect for his friend, indeed his mentor, C3P0 Pez. He says that C3P0's wisdom is unlike any he's seen elsewhere, and his grace and pleasant personality---


C3P0 Pez
Guest translator C3P0 Pez has also lent his services to interviews with foreign dignitaries, Brazilian soap opera stars, and Bob Dylan.

C3P0 Pez: R2, please! Don't make a scene! I may have taken a few liberties with that translation, but I do believe I conveyed your main points.

R2D2 Pez: Bleep bleep blip bleep… Whirrrr bleep blip blip!!!

C3P0 Pez: I beg your pardon! I take time out of my busy schedule of dispensing fruity candy just to bring your thoughts into the light and this is the thanks I get!

R2 pops a Pez
R2D2 Pez:
"Bleep blip blip bleep?"; C3P0 Pez: "How about a Pez?"

PM: Gentlemen! Uh… I mean droids? Pez droids? Please, pull yourselves together. We're running out of time and space here, so I will ask you one more question…

C3P0 Pez: (rudely interrupting) We'll still get paid for five questions, correct? We signed a contract, after all. We may be 4-inch tall plastic toys, but we're not stooges!

PM: Yes, C3P0 Pez, your check is in the mail as we speak. Finally, R2 Pez, with your strange combination of whistles, pops, and beeps as a language, do you ever get any flack from your fellow dispensers, and if so, how do you deal with it?

R2D2 Pez: Bleep blip blip beep blip whirr.

C3P0 Pez: He says that for the most part, his Pez brothers and sisters treat him with respect and dignity. Oh, sure, every once in a while, some wise guy like Bugs Bunny Pez says something like "Hey, Doc, I think your microwave popcorn is done." But when it all comes down to it, they know that R2 Pez dispenses his candy one brick at a time like everyone else.

R2D2 Pez: Blip bleep blip.

C3P0 Pez: You can say that again, R2!

R2D2 Pez: Blip bleep blip.

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