'Twas the Night Before Christmas Pez top of page | cover page

'Twas the night before Christmas Pez, and all through the store
Not a cashier was working, not a clerk on the floor;
The aisles were dark, and the night crew was late,
But some things in life are well worth the wait.

Us Pezheads were camped out, although cold and wet,
For rumors of new Pez were all over the 'Net.
And the mission that night of this faithful flock
Was to watch when the truck pulled into the dock.
When into the parking lot, there turned such big wheels,
I sprang from the pavement to see what's the deal.

Away to the loading docks we did take off running,
And though I tripped twice, my speed was still stunning.
The moon was a full one, and I let a howl,
For I sensed a victory from this long Pez prowl.
When we got to the dock and we saw that ramp rise,
My smile was almost as big as my eyes.

Though the little old driver did shoot us a glare,
The guy they call Nick knew why we were there.
He'd seen us before, he knew why we came,
And yet he yelled out, as if 'twas a game:

"Now, Snickers! Now, Reese's! And now, Milky Way!
Now Skittles, now Lifesavers, now Tic Tacs, hooray!
To Aisle 14! As fast as we can!
There's candy to stock, to price, and to scan!"

He loaded his cart with boxes galore,
And after ten minutes he was still loading more.
But unlike before, when our hopes were denied,
That night with a smile Nick waved us inside.
So into that store we all did advance,
Not totally sure how we'd gotten this chance.
But as the cart stopped at Aisle 14,
We all fell so silent at this wondrous scene.
Shelf after shelf was bare as can be,
Just waiting to be stocked with all that candy.
And then, on the cart, was the end of our hunt:
A small cardboard box with "PEZ" on the front.

So Nick simply nodded and gave us the cue,
And it became clear what we had to do.
I knelt down and tore the top off that box,
And what we beheld sent us all into shock.
The new Christmas Pez, right here in the store!
In glossy green wrappers, there were twenty-four.
'Twas Santa, so jolly, and now with some glasses,
A new Snowman, too, for the Pez-hungry masses.
And the new Polar Bear, with a cap on its head,
Along with a Reindeer Pez, fresh from its sled.
I was so amazed, so beside myself,
For we even had found that rare Christmas Elf!

And then, in my mind, a thought very weird:
Whenever did Nick grow that long white beard?
And that big round belly, and that nice red suit?
Did that play a part in this grand Pez pursuit?
Then the lights all came on, and the doors opened wide-
How long had we been with this Pez here inside?
We looked up at Nick, but he was not there,
Not even a trace of him, this I do swear.
But I heard him exclaim, as that truck drove from sight,

"Christmas Pez is for all, and for all a delight!"

One Simple Question for the Elf Pez Dispenser top of page | cover page

Pezhead Monthly: Elf Pez, you have been by far the hardest dispenser to find of the new Christmas Pez set this year. What gives? Elf Pez: I'd like to take this opportunity to apologize to Pez collectors everywhere for my "missing in action" status, and to assure everyone that soon I will be easier to find than an old lady at a bingo parlor. Thing is, Santa Pez has got me working overtime, as usual. It's the typical story- he and his friends go out and have a great time with Pez collectors all over the world, and I'm stuck up here in the toy workshop, putting the finishing touches on a He-Man action figure. Where's the justice, I ask you?

Pez Poetry top of page | cover page

Pez Haiku #18

Dashing through the snow
Makes it rather hard to load
A Pez dispenser.

Dear Santa

I know that last year I was wrong
To send a list five pages long,
So this year it is short and sweet:
Just bring me Pez, that tasty treat.