2005 Pez Poetry Slam (continued) top of page | cover page

Office Pez

Many times I think of Pez
As I pass the day.
A project here, a meeting there,
It's never far away.

Write an e-mail, send a fax,
Type up a report.
With thoughts of Pez, I'll get it done,
My office self-support.

The phone is ringing off the hook,
The copier is busted.
It's times like these I count on Pez
To keep me well-adjusted.

Pez Haiku #52

Gas prices are high,
And soon Pez prices will be, too.
Curse these wretched times.

Reggae Charley (best read in a Rastafarian voice)

There once was a Pezhead named Charley
Who enjoyed the songs of Bob Marley
Oh ya he be jammin',
But he also be scammin'
All my Pez, and mon, that ain't gnarly

Dude, That's Pez
By M.T. Chambers

P lastic toys,
E dible treats?
Z any characters,

C olors neat?
A round for years,
N ever beat?
D ude, that's Pez!
Y o, that's sweet!

Seventeen Mickeys and Twenty-Three Freds

Seventeen Mickeys and twenty-three Freds,
A gaggle of Snoopys and Valentine Reds,
A Pumpkin or twelve and Kermits galore,
More Garfields and Tweetys than I have room for.
But I will not sell or dump them, you see,
For they were all gifts from others to me.

Someone was thinking of me at the shop,
They noticed some Pez and just had to stop.
Someone was taking a vacation jaunt
And picked up some Pez they thought I would want
So how could I sell or dump them, you see?
For they were all gifts from others to me.

Thirty-six Yodas and Witches aplenty,
How many Snowmen? At least ten or twenty.
A buttload of Batmans, a surplus of Santas,
Enough Smiley Faces to fill up Montana.
But I will not sell or dump them, you see,
For they were all gifts from others to me.

Now being a Pezhead has plenty of perks,
Your hobby is known at home and at work
They see a cool Pez, then hurry and grab it:
A network of folks supporting your habit.
Oh how could I sell or dump them, you see?
For they were all gifts from others to me.

There may come a day when I'm suddenly given
A Pez from way back in the year '67-
A Snow White found in an old attic drawer
By someone who knew just who it was for.
But till that day comes, I am grateful instead
For seventeen Mickeys and twenty-three Freds.

Pez Haiku #53

Did you hear the one
About the furious Pez?
Man, he really flipped.

Thanks for reading the 2005 Pez Poetry Slam!

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