Spring Loaded: A Message from the Editor top of page | cover page

Welcome to Pezhead Monthly! Enjoy the many Pez love songs in this month's issue, as well as the exclusive Five Questions with the Psychedelic Flower Pez Plush, and some Pez Poetry and of course the Pez Almost-Quote.

Sorry to cut and run, but "24" is starting right now. That may very well be my second-highest obsession these days.

Joe Durrant
Editor, Pezhead Monthly
joe@pezheadmonthly.com

Pez Love Songs top of page | cover page

Love is in the air this month, as people all over the world celebrate Valentine's Day. Herewith, five songs that prove that when it comes to love, the wonderful world of Pez has got it covered.

You’ve Lost My Pez Dispensers
To the tune of "You've Lost That Lovin' Feeling" as performed by The Righteous Brothers
Copyright 2005 JoePez Publications

You never get the phone when I call you up anymore
And there’s no answer when I stop by and knock on your door
You fill my heart with such sorrow, baby
And baby, did you lose what you borrowed?

You've lost my Pez dispensers
Whoa, my Pez dispensers
You've lost my Pez dispensers
Now they’re gone, gone, gone, wooooooh

Now there’s an empty space right there where they all used to be
And I remember how they never failed to delight me
I should have just been more cautious, baby
Cause baby, now I’m just feeling nauseous

You've lost my Pez dispensers
Whoa, my Pez dispensers
You've lost my Pez dispensers
Now they’re gone, gone, gone, wooooooh

Baby, baby, I’ll cover the next three months’ rent
If you would only return the Pez I lent, yeah
Those are some Pez, some Pez, some Pez you don’t find everyday
So don't, don't, don't, put them out on eBay
Baby, baby, baby, baby
I beg of you please, please, please, please
I need my Pez, I need my Pez
I need my Pez, I need my Pez
So bring ‘em on back, so bring ‘em on back
Bring ‘em on back, so bring ‘em on back

Bring back my Pez dispensers
Whoa, my Pez dispensers
Bring back my Pez dispensers
'Cause they’re gone, gone, gone

And I can't go on, no oh ohh

Bring back my Pez dispensers
Whoa, my Pez dispensers
Bring back my Pez dispensers
'Cause they’re gone, gone, gone

Dispensers on the Rack
To the tune of "Strangers In the Night" as performed by Frank Sinatra
Copyright 2005 JoePez Publications

Dispensers on the rack, a dollar fifty,
Hanging here with you, it would be nifty
If a passerby would stop and find us here

Something on your card, it’s so appealin’
Something in the lights up on the ceilin’
Makes you shine just like a newborn baby’s rear

Dispensers on the rack, two souls suspendin’,
We’re dispensers on the rack, our lives dependin’
On someone to find us neat,
Wouldn’t that be sweet,
We can have a deep affection, as a part of their collection

Here comes someone now, and I’m supposin’
That before too long, we will be chosen
There’s no turning back
For dispensers on the rack.

Doobie doobie doo, a dooby dooby
Pez for me and you, that sure is groovy

Love Dispensers
To the tune of "Love Me Tender" as performed by Elvis Presley
Copyright 2005 JoePez Publications

Love dispensers, love the treat
To be found inside.
Take a bite, it’s oh so sweet,
You’ll be glad you tried.

Love dispensers, love the sound
When you pull the sleeve
It’s the coolest noise around,
This I do believe.

Love dispensers, love the chance
To get them in stores.
Do a very joyful dance
When you find some more.

Love dispensers, love the way
They improve with age,
Put them all out on display,
Give those stars a stage.

Items on the Shelf
To the tune of "Islands in the Stream" as performed by Dolly Parton and Kenny Rogers
Copyright 2005 JoePez Publications

Boy Pez:
Baby when I met ya,
You were still on card.
Couldn’t barely breathe,
I bet your life was hard
Till that magic day arrived,
And there was something goin’ on.

Girl Pez:
I was kinda jealous,
Cause you were so free,
Then I heard a ripping
And it happened to me
Now I’m standing next to you
And we got somethin’ goin on.

Boy Pez:
Pez can’t be denied,
It is pure exhilaration
So take us off our cards,
Let us have our liberation
We’ll be displayed here together, aha
We got it made here together, aha

Both:
Items on the shelf,
That is what we are,
Standing by ourselves
How can that be wrong
Be displayed with me,
On these plastic steps,
And go one day to another, aha,
’Cause we’re Pez and like no other, aha.

Girl Pez:
Ev’ryday it seems
That there is more to display
It looks like someone’s getting
Busy on eBay
And I don’t care about the crowd,
As long as I am next to you.

Boy Pez:
Baby, don’t you worry
When the wind does blow,
’Cause we’re secured with tape
And so we’re good to go,
We’ll be standing tall and proud,
As long as I am next to you.

Girl Pez:
Pez is really fine,
It’s an endless fascination
And now that we’re both loose,
There can be no hesitation,
We’ll be displayed here together, aha
We got it made here together, aha

Both:
Items on the shelf,
That is what we are,
Standing by ourselves
How can that be wrong
Be displayed with me,
On these plastic steps,
And go one day to another, aha,
’Cause we’re Pez and like no other, aha.

Dispensin’
To the tune of "Heaven" as performed by Bryan Adams
Copyright 2005 JoePez Publications

Oh- thinkin’ about the emptiness
There was nothing to be had,
We were young and we were sad
Now everything’s filled and life is sweet,
We’ve got Pez candy galore,
Just have some now,
‘Cause there’ll be a whole lot more.

Baby just take what you want,
Cause I’m loaded up tonight
I’m finding it hard to believe
We’re dispensin’.
Just let me tilt that head,
And behold the candy delight.
It isn't too hard to see
We're dispensin.’

Oh- once you are filled with fruity fun,
You’re prepared for life’s odd turns,
Because you got what people yearn.
Yeah, nothin’ can beat the gift of Pez
Just go ahead and flick that wrist
And I’ll warn you now,
It’s a rush you can’t resist.

Baby just take what you want,
Cause I’m loaded up tonight
I’m finding it hard to believe
We’re dispensin’.
Just let me tilt that head,
And behold the candy delight.
It isn't too hard to see
We're dispensin.’

Oh yeah, yeah yeah.

I’ve been waitin’ for so long,
Cause the chambers have been dry,
And life has been so wrong.
Now the Pez just flows like wine,
All the flavors to be shared,
Yeah, we’ll all be doin’ fine.

Baby just take what you want,
Cause I’m loaded up tonight
I’m finding it hard to believe
We’re dispensin’.
Just let me tilt that head,
And behold the candy delight.
It isn't too hard to see
We're dispensin'.

Cover and Table of Contents | Page 2 | Page 3